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Adult Tongue Tie: How to Choose a Provider + VIDEO

How to choose your provider for your tongue tie

The two most important parts of a tongue tie release are also the most difficult. (newest video down below) If you skip all of the other steps: bodywork, myofunctional therapy, sleep study, measurements, years of waiting and stressing and living in denial (oh, that might just have been my story), DON’T SKIP THESE TWO REQUIRED STEPS.

CHOOSE YOUR PROVIDER VERY CAREFULLY and DO THE STRETCHES

In my experience, stretches and exercises are different.

When you find The Right provider, you’ll quickly know the difference between stretches and exercises and so will your chosen expert. The right provider is someone who’s done A Lot of tongue tie releases. Some providers work with only children, some work with only adults, some are gluttons for punishment and treat ALL THE AGES. 😛 Of course you’ll want to find someone that treats the age group that you’re looking for. (I went to a general dentist that treats infants through adulthood. My children saw a pediatric dentist that only treats infants up to teens).

The right provider will also know A Lot about ties. I don’t mean they tell you about them or tell you they know about them. I mean that they ask you questions that might sound completely off topic.

You’re answering their questions while still secretly deciding if it’s too late to run:

“Yes I have GI problems, but doesn’t everyone?”

“Sure, I’m just one of those pill crusher people. It’s not that I can’t swallow pills….”

“Yes I snore, but why all the chit chat?”

 

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Tongue tie experts are aware that tongue ties can affect so many parts of the body. They’re not asking about the mouth, which seems WAY off topic, but try to take that as as a good sign! They also should talk to you about the research. There is some evidence out there about tongue ties and breastfeeding, there isn’t much for adults, but many more studies are in the works everyday.

Questions to Ask the Potentials

Some questions to ask when deciding on a provider:

  • What do you except this release to do for me?
  • What symptoms can I expect to have improvements in?
  • When do you expect me to feel improvement in my symptoms?
  • What kind of follow up care is required of me?

You are looking for a provider that stands behind their work. They know they do an excellent job. They also want you to have the best possible outcome, so they want to help you achieve that. They have the tools and education to share with you to help you achieve a full release. It’s not uncommon that they’ll follow up with you regularly. Your provider wants to see that you’re on the right track for maximum improvement of symptoms and a full release, and they know that corrections can be made to post-care stretches within days to weeks after the release. (This might look like a call or text that night! They might wait a few days and have their office staff follow up in a week and call back if you have concerns.)

When a Tongue Tie Release Never Helps

Do you want someone performing a small surgery if they don’t believe that it will help you? I’ve heard so many providers say,

“This could be your problem, but it’s unlikely. It’s more of a rumor or fad. But if you’re set on having this done, I can release your tongue for you and then see how it goes.”

What’s probably happening is that they say this line to many people, they do a partial release that is not accompanied with recommended stretches, exercises, or bodywork, there is little or no improvement in symptoms, and the providers are proven “right” again and again. They see it happen, so their understanding never changes and they don’t seek additional training or evidence on the subject, because to them, a tongue tie release NEVER helps.

AAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

I’ve actually seen this scenario play out many times. Instead of (confirming the provider’s guess, this scenario demonstrates) proving the provider right over and over, this actually shows me their misunderstanding of healthy frena. It highlights their lack of skill in assessing a tight frenum in the first place and their lack of confidence in diagnosing a tie that needs corrected. They assessment should include a hands-in-the-mouth feel around in addition to a thorough full-body questionnaire.

It might just be me, but I want an expert to tell me what they recommend and how they think they can help me best. It makes me nervous when they say to me, “I don’t think that procedure will help you, I have no other alternatives that will be better for you, so I’ll perform the procedure anyway if you really want me to.” Come back if it doesn’t work.Hmmmm….

Nope.

Instead, I want the expert to tell me how long they’ve studied their specialty, how many people they’ve helped that were just like me, and the awesome benefits that I’ll get from said procedure. No wishy washy stuff. They’ll generally be charging my insurance, me, or both a bunch of money for this procedure – prove to me that it’s worth it and teach me how I can ensure that it doesn’t reattach and my tension can be improved at the same time. 

Are you looking for a provider for yourself or your babies? Let me know here if you need the names of mine!


Fellow tied friends or curiously tied: thank you for following my journey. Let’s connect! Comment below if you’ve been released or have self diagnosed and are living vicariously I only know of my sisters going through this process with me – I’d love to hear more stories of how it went for others.

Picture of Mandy Irby
Mandy Irby
Mandy Irby is a board-certified labor nurse with 13 years of experience supporting survivors of assault and trauma through pregnancy, birth planning, and at their bedside during childbirth and pregnancy loss. Mandy is an international educator through her online, on-demand childbirth ed classes and community exclusively for nurses to shed the shame and powerlessness they feel to change the very system L&D nurses were setup to fail in. She's passionate about shaping the future of nursing to improve childbirth outcomes! As a creative educator, Mandy co-authored Amazon best-seller, Baby Got VBAC.  Many know her through her wildly popular, tongue-in-cheek social media platforms.

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  4. Hi – I’ve just binge watched your whole series on your TT release. How did everything go in the end? Do you have photos to compare before and after???

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